Do not be afraid to open yourself to love

• April 19, 2024

Very often I listen to speeches related to the fear of loneliness . There is no doubt that it is an existential fear: that is, all of us are separated from others in a strict sense, and this separation leads us to feel the need to share our inner world with others. When we manage to communicate and feel touched by the other, we overcome that fear of loneliness.

Loneliness has nothing to do with living in company or being in company. There are families of desolated people very well organized. There is couples that are far from each other even if they live together. Feeling desolate has to do with not be open to love .

Modern society, which is a consumer par excellence, has developed strategies to evade feeling of isolation that when invading us, it can sadden us, worry us and make us feel overwhelmed.

Thus, it invades us and tries to convince us that if we weigh so many kilograms, or drive a certain car, or use a certain cream on our face, we will be more loved and we will no longer feel alone. It is one of the biggest lies that exist.

The answer is not in consumption. Neither in success. Making a wild run for having money or possessions that make us feel less alone is not the way. It can even be counterproductive. Investing in the superfluous does not help either. In fact the existential vacuum It usually arises as a consequence of living "outside", that is, pretending to achieve the appreciation of others through our professional or economic achievements.

This does not mean that it is not a priority to obtain the indispensable economic resources to achieve a decent standard of living, or that we do not try to be better in our work day by day: the essential is distinguish my motivations , and have a clear awareness of the reason for my actions: that is, sense of each of my acts.

Overcoming existential isolation is possible only through the open and deep communication with the other . And we must know that it is overcome for instants and then we return to be alone, with ourselves, that is not desolate: that is to be without ourselves.

To have yourself means to be at peace with your conscience. Act in such a way that you feel an internal pride of having done the right thing. For this we need times of solitude to be able to analyze our actions and decide how we want to be and live . Be your friend first, take care of yourself, know your needs and take responsibility for yourself is a priority. But also, and at the same time, open yourself to love. How?

I think the only way is try to be with who I am at that precise moment . Yes I am with my friend drinking coffee, I must not distract myself, I must concentrate on their conversation, listen to them and also share my thoughts and feelings. Let's not forget that not sharing my inner world keeps me away from others. And also express my love, my taste and gratitude for being with her.

And so, with every person I meet. Yes I live with other people trying to be, really be, in body and soul with others. It can help a lot to embrace the other . A hug heals, calms, nourishes.

Opening up to love is a decision. Let's not confuse the fact of not having a partner with not being open to giving and receiving love of the others. We do not believe that if we do not have a perfect family we do not deserve love. Do not make a mistake thinking that if you lived a painful childhood or one or more difficult experiences in your life you are not worthy of love. As well as yes we do not have an extraordinary economic position or an overwhelming beauty.

Opening to love is recognizing that I want to be loved . It is to recognize that I need the affection of others. It is recognizing that feeling the company and the closeness of those who love me is the most important food for the soul.

To live is not to have achievements all the time. To live is to feel. And feeling love depends on us. Free yourself from the fear of being vulnerable , to love is to risk being hurt, to love is to recognize that I need love, to love is to expose oneself with the other, but if we do not, we run the most terrible risk: that of being dead in life.

Video Medicine: Don’t be afraid to open yourself up to love #MosheMondays (April 2024).