10 tips to strengthen your communication as a couple

Willy Pasini, founder of the European Federation of Sexology and specialist in psychiatry at the Universities of Geneva and Milan, said in a survey of 700 married couples over 15 years that a third party confessed to having Sexuality abandoned completely.

The reason they were still together, according to Dr. Pasini, was "because they exchanged positive feelings as tenderness, trust, esteem, reciprocity. " What would be, then, the recipe to feed the desire? The specialist's response would be the first of the 10 recommendations offered to couples who wish to strengthen their communication:

1. Pay attention to the needs, tastes and preferences of the other. "Unfortunately, men and women are increasingly focusing on their own satisfaction, which results in the loss of interest in sex within the couple's relationship ", according to the also author of the book" What is the couple for? "

2. They rekindle the emotion of seduction. For sex therapist Dagmar O'Connor, "play convince me " Once in a while it's a lovely way to break away from the routine of sex life in long-term relationships. " In her book "How to make love with the same person for the rest of life", the specialist points out that you have to put emotion to sex and not see it as a mere biological need.

3. Learn to read the changes . Many times, and in spite of the time shared with the couple, we continue to be guided by preconceived ideas and we do not see what we think does not exist. Maybe your partner would love to learn to cook, but do not leave it; or you would like to learn mechanics, but your husband denies it. If the behavior changes are not appreciated, it goes back to the usual boring schemes.

4. Say NO to the labels. It is common for us to pigeonhole ourselves by defining ourselves in opposition to the other. Assuming these rigid roles makes the evolution of the couple difficult. The relationship stagnates with the obvious frustration and bitterness. We do not let them know us just as we really are.

5. Open to the novelty. Life and the couple will be much more interesting if we are open to new experiences. It is easier to accept novelty in a stable partner than in a new one. If we do pleasurable activities, We will return home with more energy and experiences to share.

6. Grow without distances. One of the main obstacles to a stable relationship is the inability to find common projects. When we started dating our partner, we dreamed about the things and trips we would do together. Has any of those dreams been fulfilled? Are we still making plans or would we like to carry out the projects before? Joining the other in your activities and fantasies is one of the most effective ways to keep a relationship alive.

7. Curiosity for the other. Complicity and intimacy are pleasant because they allow us to be surprised every day with aspects of the personality of the other we did not know. Show curiosity about the partner is to inject interest into the relationship.

8. Mutual surprises. They say that life is made of small details. Some flowers from time to time, an invitation to dine at the favorite restaurant for no reason, are small and very effective surprises . It is always good for the couple to give themselves a gift, for no apparent reason.

9. Live with intensity . Put soul and heart in every action that is undertaken with the couple. Says writer Barbara De Angelis, "passionate people are not afraid to live intensely. They do not distrust their emotions and enjoy, feel and commit. "

10. As the last recommendation of this decalogue, the author of the book "Passion", points out the importance of reinforce our commitments . Thinking about the plots of life that interest us as a couple, delving into them and delivering the best of each one of us, generates enthusiasm for life.
 


Video Medicine: Build don't break relationships with communication - connect the dots | Amy Scott | TEDxQueenstown (March 2024).